There's a reason why Nadia always has to move schools
by Miss Grayson-Barton
Summary: "Class this is our new student Nadia Burton. I'd like you to treat her with the utmost respect." In which Tony Stark screws up at every new school Natalia Nadia Barton attempts to attend. Clintasha/BlackHawk. Kidfic featuring the wonderful Uncle Tony. Safe Series 3/9
1. Corridors

So this should've been out months ago, but I'm lazy and I really should set myself deadlines to finish these more quickly. And this is part 3/5 in the Safe series. But it won't be finished when I upload it because it's a series of one-shjots that ill update whenever i can be arsed to write my ideas. These chapters will be set between the Safe sequel, Home, Moving On, or following the latter of the two.

**Disclaimer:** As per usual, I still don't own the Avengers or Clintasha yet, and if tumblr sold for $1.2 billion, then I'll never be able to buy Marvel or hire Stan Lee as my adopted grandpa. So sorry people, I only own the three kids rather than the entire Barton clan and Uncle Tony.

Also, I'm not native to New York, or the USA for that matter, so I don't know any high schools or how the American educational system runs, so I'm making these high schools up because I'm English.

This one takes place between _Home_ and _Moving On_. However, for everyone looking confused as to why part 2, _Home_ hasn't been published yet, it's because I haven't written yet. I'll upload it when I have. I just thought, hey, I haven't uploaded anything in months, so I'll give you all a late Christmas/early New Years present so...

* * *

_Thomasbrooke High School_

Natalia Nadia Barton, or Natalie "Naddy" Burton as she went by whilst not with her _family_, had been at Thomas-something High for the better part of six weeks. Thats six weeks she'd managed to last without threatening another student, getting kicked out or having to move because her slightly crazed, genius billionaire ex-playboy philanthropist uncle decided to do something drastic.

At first it got a bit annoying, having to enrol in a new high school every few weeks, but she quickly got used to it and completed her work at home under her family's _tutoring_, but she managed to finish her year's worth of courses within six months. It was either that or be stuck re-starting her courses with the high schools every other week. But still, she was forced to attend lecture like every other teenage, just for the sake of looking more _normal_. Then on top of that there was her severe lack of friends, due to the constant moving and the fact that she couldn't tell anyone the truth about her situation. At least when she'd been with Sojo she'd been able to attend the same school for the majority of her life, whilst lying to her friends about the awesome life she had with her "_mom_".

But believe it or not, the eldest Barton was happy. She saw her dad at least twice a week rather than once every four months if she was lucky, she got to see her brother and her week-old baby sister Alyona, and her mom was even on maternity leave for another seven months (seen as though she stopped working when she was four months pregnant). Heck, she even got to see the rest of her _"relatives"_ regularly – her uncles in the Avengers and their partners, her aunties – at least four times a week for tutoring.

Natalie stood impatiently twiddling her thumbs outside her biology classroom waiting for her greasy haired teacher to show up to actually _teach_ her lesson – not that she knew what he was talking about.

So as soon as she heard the sound of familiar footsteps approaching her from behind, her she tensed up. A quick glance to her left revealed that her assumption was correct, as she spotted her uncle strutting confidently down the hallway with her teacher, Mrs Brunswick, on his arm.

"So Susannah, I can call you Susannah right? Well I'm not calling you Mrs Brunswick, it makes us both feel old," Tony flirted. The forty-something year old teacher giggled like a school girl with a crush. _Oh brother_, Nadia thought.

"And all the money will go directly into modernising the science wing," he continued. "Because I'm the face of science, and science is awesome." [A.N./ free virtual fez to that belonged to him if you can guess the character who said that/the name of the show if you guess correctly. Or maybe bowties or Stetsons if you'd prefer them to the fez.]

Natalie just rolled her eyes and began to tune him and her surroundings out. Well, she did until Stark began to incessantly nudge her shoulder blade with his index finger [A.N./ minds out of the gutter, I mean he just won't stop poking her shoulder until she gets her attention]. It looked like she'd won the bet with her mother about how long it would take her eccentric uncle to find her.

"Mr Sta – I mean Tony, please can you stop poking my student? It will probably result in some kind of harassment charges."

Natty's patience snapped. She grabbed Tony's hand and twisted it harshly behind his back.

Mrs Brunswick glared at her student with both a mixture of shock, horror and disapproval. "Burton, stop!" Her facial expression quickly changed, and in a flirtatious, sweet voice she continued. "We don't want Mr Stark to press charges."

Tony laughed. "It's okay, Katniss doesn't like surprise visits." He winced as he retracted his hand. "And she's also my niece. And she might be the kid of two of the world's best spies who thought a good bonding experience would be to teach her to shoot with incredible accuracy."

At this point, students who had been in their classrooms were now crowding the hallway, along with the teachers, all of them pushing each other, vying for the best view. One hundred percent of them were paying attention to every word of the conversation.

"Why are you here Uncle Tony?"

"Because I miss you."

"Bullshit." She quipped. "He saw me last night, he doesn't miss me. And now mom owes me money for winning our bet," she casually stated as she stood filing her nails with a pocket knife which had appeared out of nowhere.

"Jesus Merida! Stop being so normal about all those hidden weapons you never leave the house without."

"And he wouldn't sue me anyway Mrs Brunswick, as he's scared of my mom and doesn't want to get into trouble with her for getting me kicked out of another school. And he loves me so it's a good job I love him too. Otherwise he'd have a knife in his back, an arrow up his ass and a widow bite scar on his throat."

"I'm bored. Let's just go already Iron Ass."

"She comes from a family of crazies, and her parents are government approved psychopaths," he stated as a way of attempting to explain what had just happened.

_WHOOOOOSSSHHH._

Tony looked up to see the pocket knife embedded into the locker half an inch above his skull. Stepping forward, he ran his hand through his hair and discovered that his beloved niece had left a Mohawk shaped gap where she had thrown her knife. He sighed, like he didn't expect anything different of her.

The crowd parted around her like the Red Sea did for Moses as she strode off.

"You better bring my knife Uncle Tony or I'll gut you," Nadia called in an innocent voice.

Tony scowled as he yanked the knife from it's position in the locker. As soon as he turned around and saw everyone's slack jawed expressions he burst out laughing. He loved the affect he had on people, but in his opinion, the reactions people had to his niece of a much higher entertainment value. "I love that girl."

"By boring _normal_ people," he waved over his shoulder as he cockily walked through the gap which the teenage ninja had left in the crowd. "I've got a babysitting appointment."

All the confused people heard as Tony walked off talking into his Stark phone was something about someone called Jarvis and removing video footage.

* * *

Et voilà people. All done. Thanks for reading.


	2. AN to be updated

Haven't written this part yet. To be updated soon.


	3. Hospital

**Disclaimer:** *strokes chin* nope no beard, mousey blonde-brown hair, no cool glasses and no moustache. Damn, I'm not Stan Lee. Or a guy either for that matter so...

The rest of these one-shots will take place after _Moving On_. This takes place three months after _Moving On_, and seven months after _Corridor_, so Naddy goes to another school after leaving Thomasbrooke before attending Eden. I'm don't have any idea what to put for that scene yet, I literally only have the school name, so I could use a prompt guys. So to avoid confusion people, she was at another school for a month, for Natasha's last month of maternity leave. Clint's now just started on babysitting duty.

* * *

_Eden Falls Academy for the academically talented_

For a "posh" private school with a really crappy name, Natalie Barwick didn't actually mind her overpriced school. Yes, the _academy_ taught both genders, but the students were so much more well-mannered and they behaved a lot better than the Neanderthals the population liked to call public school students. Plus, despite being friendless, and obviously not wealthy (her Uncle Tony may be the world's best hacker, but he still couldn't learn to logout of his online bank accounts before his niece accessed them, and despite what people thought, his A.I. did have a sense of humour, hence why she could afford to pay to study at the academy), this was actually one of her favourite schools to have attended.

Well except for the fact that an arrogant ass named Lionel Edwards IV - who was the son of one of New York's most overpaid and _best_ lawyers - who talked down to her for thinking she was poor (which she wasn't, as her parents may not be paid much for being non-existent government spies, but they did have rather large hidden deposits from their past lives as hired mercenaries, it's just that they liked to see how long it took Stark to notice things when he spent millions monthly on testing his new inventions). The egotistic, conceited, narcissistic, pompous brat (there were never enough words in the world to describe him in her opinion) may not be as much of an arrogant ass as her uncle, but at least Tony had a separate personality and a decent sense of humour. And to top it off, the snobby bastard has the nerve to gaze at her breasts as he tried to seduce her. The young trainee assassin was incredibly close to breaking his nose and ribs and well... the rest of his bones really with his attempts to gain her as a piece of arm-candy. Did he think she was a bimbo? They were attending a school for _smart_ students - well _really_, the school was for rich mommys' boys and daddys' spoilt little princesses.

At least she could go home at the end of the day though to avoid the little lion cub (because Lionel certainly didn't have to bravery of a lion, he screamed because a spider was on the wall five metres away from him for Christ's sake! [He's just meant to look like a pussy people, I'm not trying to purposefully offend anyone] He sounded like a six year old at a Bieber concert!). Unlike the rest of the spoilt brats, she lived quarter of a mile away from her home, whilst the rest of the students' parents were spread out across the entire continent and southern Europe in villas.

Natasha had gone back to work, but luckily her dad's paternity leave had just begun, so Alyona, Josef and Nadia were eager to spend as much time with their father as possible whilst they still could. Plus it was a better opportunity for the sniper to relax and wind-down after seeing the things he had to see in his job. That was the main benefit of not staying in the dorms - the second being avoiding Edwards of course.

Apparently thinking about Alyona being seven months old had led her thoughts stray, Naddy realised, as she glanced at the click to see that she now only had twenty minutes of the lesson remaining.

That apparently wasn't enough time to start daydreaming again as a familiar face peaked through the doorway. Nadia scowled quietly to herself whilst her classmates faces showed nothing but awe or extreme interest – obviously some of the businessmen's teenage children seemed to be following in their parent's footsteps as they were analysing Tony and scheming amongst themselves about making deals to gain approval and affection.

"Hello," Tony stated casually as he strode into the room, ignoring the confused face the teacher was pulling. "I'm Tony Stark, obviously, you'd have to have lived in a cave for a few decades to not know who I am. But that's not important." He stopped in the middle of the room, glancing around before his gaze settled on Nadia. He turned in a circle in his usual dramatic manner to face the teacher. "I'm looking for my niece."

Apparently everything else was forgotten momentarily as the class' gossip-hounds scented the air for a new story.

"Katniss Merida Burton."

Nadia facepalmed.

"I'm afraid we don't have a Katniss Burton," Mr Santiago stated as her attempted to outwit our favourite genius.

"It's a nickname Watson," he mimicked in an overly exaggerated BBC English accent. "I'm looking for –"

"Me sir," Nadia answered. "My Uncle Tony has nicknames for everyone he likes, so luckily I'm on that list." She glared briefly at Tony after she cut him off; she couldn't have him using her actual identity or one of her fake aliases after all, that's how the Red Room found her in her first school she attended after Sonja's death.

"What's wrong Uncle?" She asked politely, as she acted innocently to distract her classmates from the fact Stark had no biological siblings, so he wasn't her uncle by blood.

"Your mom's in hospital."

"So?" Nadia reacted without thinking about what she was saying. The class gasped at her callous response.

"So she got shot Merida."

"She'll get over it."

"That's despicable," a certain air-head exclaimed.

_So he's trying to act like I'm a monster so he looks better to Uncle Tony_, Nadia thought. _Sleazy sycophant_.

"No, that's me being experienced. My mum's been shot more than ten times during my life, let alone _before_ I was born. She bounces back from it quickly." She retorted.

Edwards sat down and closed his mouth. He didn't like being shown up by a woman, especially not in front of Tony Stark.

Tony laughed. "You've got that right Katniss."

"So if mum's going on medical leave, for what, like a week before she's back to her normal strength, and if everyone but you is here – "

"Nu-uh," Tony butted in like an inpetulant child. "Pepper's not at the hospital right now."

"Probably because she just picked up Jojo and she's looking after Aly as well."

Stark, for the first time ever, in public anyway, began to pull his guilty face.

Nadia smirked. "So if I call my mom right now, she's going to tell me that you're not at the medical base because she kicked you out of the room because of a stupid comment." She glanced up and saw the partially dazzled expression on her uncle's face.

"What do my parents do for a living frying pan?"

"Hey!"

"It rhymes with _Iron Man_, now shush up a second Uncle Tony. Mom taught me everything she knows, so I can read it in your eyes."

"Okay, I'm calling bull-crap on that one Katniss."

"So I lied. I know you, and I know my mom and dad. They only threaten to physically harm you less than five times a day now for your stupid smart-ass comments. What are you here for Tony? It took you six months to figure out which school I was going to."

"I asked Pepper."

"And you didn't check your bills. Shame on you Mr Hacker."

"In all fairness Naddy, you made it look like I was buying new materials to make more suits.

"That I did, that I did."

"Wait what!" Lionel interrupted. Nadia just held out her hand to the side in a _don't-talk-I'm-not-listening_ manner. Tony just laughed at the teen's face - he'd met the brat before and considered him to be as much of a kiss-ass (to clients and a jerk to everyone else) as his father. Which meant that Tony disliked him.

"You're meant to be babysitting aren't you Uncle Tony?"

"Yup."

"And you know Aunt Pepper won't do it for you because you deserved your punishment."

"Yup."

"And you want me to look after my siblings."

"Finally, you're understanding my situation Little Miss Muffet."

"Tough stuff Uncle Tony. I'm coming to watch and video your failure," she laughed as she picked up her bag and left the stunned, silent classroom.

* * *

And there you have it.

*Puts on Porky Pig's accent* And that's all folks.

Thanks for reading. Leave a review or a pm if you want to give me a prompt for another one-shot, although I probably won't write a scene for a while, and only if the prompt inspires me so...

TTFN for now *Bounces off like Tigger*


	4. AN to be updated too

Haven't written this part yet. To be updated soon.


	5. Independence Day

So this one's written to show Tony visiting Naddy's school for an Independence Day lecture. And coincidentally, Stark is the patron of her current high school. And as per usual, Nadia's attempts at hiding in plain sight still haven't stopped Tony.

**Disclaimer:** Stan Lee is my adoptive grandfather, and he has given me the Avengers as a birthday present.  
Natasha, Clint and Tony: *glares*  
Nadia: *looks amused*  
Josef and Alyona have no clue what's going on.  
Okay, sadly that was a **_lie_**, as I don't own anything Marvel, and Stan Lee hasn't adopted me yet. *Sighs* Life is a bitch. And I sadly only own Naddy, Jojo and Aly.

Anyways... this is set about two months post-_Hospital_, Nadia had a few days to get her admission sorted from the last school she got kicked out of and has had three days to settle in. So yes people, I may need another prompt for a school to bridge the gap between _Hospital_ and _Independence Day_ unless I choose to be lazy again and not bother filling the gap. Your choice, just leave your answers as reviews. I'm all out of ideas at the minute because I'm too busy mentally planning fics for other fandoms.

And on a side note, Alyona is now nine months old, and I checked baby websites, and it says they should start walking around then so...

* * *

_Sumermont House High_

Nadia had to admit that Tony was getting better at finding her. She'd been attending lessons at Sumermont for a grand total of three days, and that included the first day she missed to sort her room out. As pissed as she was at her uncle, she was glad to be going back to New York and out of the boarding school hidden somewhere on the outskirts of the Rockies. She thought she'd be stuck there, thinking her uncle wasn't smart enough to check his own 'pet-projects' - she wasn't calling him stupid, because her Uncle Tony Stark was a freaking genius, but she despised it when Pepper used his profits to found schools back when he was the slightly _more_ obnoxious CEO of Stark Industries.

But apparently, her beloved uncle had had Jarvis monitoring the schools, or that he'd had his beloved A.I. searching for any obvious identities she could be using. She wasn't stupid enough to use her parents false surnames for any of their many other identities, because fake names could mean life or death for them. Maybe using her Natalie Archer id was a bit obvious though, especially for a new transfer student who just started mid-term in a high school which Tony was a patron of. She was never going to live this down.

This school, unlike others she'd attended, was structured like an English primary school. So each morning, the entirety of the school body was forced to attend an incredibly dull assembly. The only difference was that today was Independence Day, and a special guest was going to be the speaker.

The guest speaker just happened to be the school's patron, her wonderful Uncle Anthony. And she had never been more glad to see him in her life (besides from when the Red Room last found her). Well, she was glad until he opened his mouth.

"So as all you lovely young adults probably know, today is Independence Day. And as you're all hormonal teenagers who hate assemblies, I'm not going to make a big speech about what all this is about." Whilst the teachers all began coughing and spluttering, Nadia forced herself not to face palm at her uncle's casual remark. The other students however all simultaneously relaxed, with the jocks acting like dicks and the nerds drooling at being so close to their idol, and the majority of the female population hanging off his every word, despite the fact that he was old enough to be their father.

"And as the patron of this school I'm glad to announce how awesome I am" - Nadia couldn't suppress the eye roll at that comment - "And how awesome some of you are too by association."

Nadia gradually began to reduce herself into a ball from her spot on the bleachers, hoping no-one would notice. Unfortunately, her 'friend' of all of two days, a cute looking brunette nerd named Marvin Samuels, noticed.

"Oh my god Natalie, that's Tony freaking Stark, why aren't you in shock right now?" He whisper-yelled in her ear. _Crap_.

"My dad works with him," she improvised, using a small amount of the truth to make her story sound more believable. "He works security and gets dragged to some of his functions, and if Mr Stark is in a good mood, he lets dad take me."

If it was at all possible, Nadia realised that she just made the situation more difficult for herself. Marvin's eyes began to bulge. His sclera reddened. Tears began to gather in the corners of his eyes and -

"Can you-"

"No."

"But you didn't know what -"

"I'm not introducing you to Tony Stark,"

"But Natalie, you're one of my only friends here, and he's my idol and -"

_And you're not guilting me Samuels,_ she thought. _And here I thought you were gonna be slightly different from everyone else who wants an autograph_.

She knew she had to try a different approach, one which would probably require a lot of bullshitting. "Look, Marvin, I'd love to introduce you, but I don't really know him. My dad takes me to some of his benefits yes, but it's only because Stark likes eye candy, and well... my mum's stunning, not that Pepper isn't, and my mum knows Pepper from an interview she did once, and they're sort-of friends, and Tony's afraid of Miss Potts' wrath so he lets my dad bring me and my siblings and -"

"And I understand now," Marvin said, the excitement glistening in his eyes had dimmed somewhat, and his face had a slightly fallen look to it. "You don't personally know him, and he probably doesn't even know your name and you can't go up to him and say 'Hey can you give my friend an autograph because my dad works for you' because it might jeopardise his job."

"Yup, you've hit the nail on the head," she replied within an utterly straight face, despite the inner turmoil she felt from lying to such an generally honest, polite young man. Unlike most of the other male teens she'd met at all the numerous schools she'd attended in her life, Marvin was more chivalrous, and he wasn't trying to get into her pants - but then again, he was a smart guy, who was near the bottom of the social ladder, and despite not being a really vain person, she knew that the bullying he received had stopped during the last two days because all the guys with a better social status didn't want to piss off the hot new girl. Which was why lying to him made her feel even more guilty.

So despite being a mini-assassin in trading, she jumped half a foot when Stark's voice shook her out of her internal monologue.

"So as you've all probably realised by now, I don't really want to be here, and neither do you. The problem is just that we've all got an obligation to be here, well me less so, it's just my beautiful, intelligent, bossy wife made me come here so I wouldn't be bothering her at the office."

Despite the lack of content to his speech, Tony had won over the entirety of the population of the room, even the stubborn, irritating, teenage-hating teachers, and everyone was laughing along with him.

Stark checked his watch and smirked to himself. "Right I've done fifteen minutes worth of talking, I'm bored and you can all go now. Except for my adopted niece."

Everyone collectively let out a startled gasp and all of the teenagers began to gossip.

_Damn it,_ Natalie thought.

"Goodbye now, you're dismissed, so buggar off back to whatever you're supposed to be doing. No questions or autographs please."

As everyone began to steadily stream out of the room however, they spotted a relatively small blonde blur launch itself across the stage to latch himself onto Tony's right leg.

"Don't worry people, he's not my secret love child, he's my demanding adopted nephew".

Marvin fixed his attention back on his only female friend after glancing at the nine year old boy, and watched in fascination as all the tension seemed to leak out of her body. Her shoulders slumped and her resolve seemed to have crumbled. That's when he realised that she'd lied to him. The way she relaxed at the sight of the small child who seemed to look nothing like her that she obviously cared for. Despite having wild, curly red hair and grey-blue eyes in comparison to the blonde haired, green eyed boy, they both just shared a common trait that he couldn't identify. He knew that she'd lied to him when the boy showed affection to the self-absorbed billionaire he called an idol, and that if the child was connected to Natalie, then she must have known more than she was letting on.

"Uncle Tony," the boy yelled as he bounced up and down whilst tugging on Tony's trousers. "Where's my сестра (sister)? Where's my Naddy?" His frustration and impatience became obvious when he immediately started stomping his feet when Stark didn't answer him right away.

"Hey, itsy bitsy young spider, I don't know where she is either, so don't start throwing a tantrum because you can't see your big sister."

Nadia sighed. As overjoyed as she was to see that her uncle had flown across the country with her younger brother, she hated having her cover blown, and having everyone treating her differently.

"Shit. Look Marvin, I'm sorry I lied, and I'd explain, but I have to protect my family, my siblings, from people who'd want to take advantage of them."

She turned to look at Marvin, who was looking back at her with a slight trace of anger and confusion flitting across his face.

"God I'm such a bitch, and you have the right to hate me but I need to go over there so -"

"I understand," he answered.

The stoic Katniss impersonator stared back at him perplexed.

"I understand," he repeated. "You don't like people trying to take advantage of the fact that you know a billionaire."

Her face softened for a second, but her eyes remained looking downward in shame. She was ashamed of herself, not just for lying to one of the most genuine people she'd ever met, but because she shouldn't have felt that way, she was supposed to remain unattached, as a child of the Black Widow and Hawkeye, she should have known that she'd have to leave him behind, and that she shouldn't have let him in through the chinks in her armour [She's not in love with him people, she's only known him two days, but she's never had a proper friend so]. But she had let him in anyway, so she might as well introduce him to her family.

"Give me your hand," she told her companion. He just looked back her sceptically. "Marvin Samuels give me your goddamn hand before I take it myself."

Marvin took one look at the intimidating face that has appeared on his friend's face, before looking down at her outstretched hand and begrudgingly accepting it. She smiled back at him when he looked back up at her. It was a hesitant, gentle smile, but for the first time, the inquisitive teenage nerd realised that it was real. That the first girl who really noticed him was trying to make amends for keeping this huge secret from him.

"I might be a spoilt daddy's little princess, but I'm not depriving you of that introduction you wanted with your favourite genius billionaire ex-playboy philanthropist, his words, not mine," she winked at him, not in a flirtatious manner, but it still made his heart flutter. _Stop it Samuels, you barely know her and she's a liar, so don't get too attached,_ he chastised himself, _she's probably going to move now people know who she is_. He sighed internally, but still allowed her to drag him through the throng of students and towards the stage.

She let go of his hand upon arrival and squatted down on hers knees just in time for Josef to plough into her [A.N./ minds out of the gutter people, that's the way say 'he ran into her' in my dialect, not all of us English people speak the same way you know, it would be like me saying a Canadian accent is the same as a Texan accent, not all of us speak like posh twats].

"Hey Jojo, how's my favourite младший брат (little brother)?"

Identical grins spread across their faces during the embrace.

"I'm a big boy now Naddy, I'm nearly ten."

"You're still younger than me Josef so by definition, you're still my little brother. But how've you been мой маленький ястреб (my little hawk)?"

"Lonely," he whined. "Dad's been stuck looking after Aly with mom working, and Uncles Tony, Bruce and Steve could only play with me for so long before they had to go back to work. And Uncle Steve won't train me without supervision from you or dad, and Uncle Tony and Uncle Bruce won't let me be their science bro and I missed you and -"

"And you feel like no-one is paying you enough attention because Alyona started walking last week and the attention is fixed on her to make sure she doesn't hurt herself."

Josef Phillip Barton nodded, and his bottom lip began to wobble like it usually did just before he burst out in tears.

"Ssshhh Jojo, it's okay, we still love you, it's just that Aly-cat is so little, like you used to be, and with mommy away, it means that everyone else has to work harder to look after her to make sure she doesn't have an accident and get hurt. You were the same and I was the same, it's just that I had Sojo looking after me whilst you had Grandma Marissa."

"And as much as I hate interrupting sibling-bonding time, there's a genius billionaire -"

"Ex-playboy philanthropist who needs attention too. We know Uncle Tony."

Nadia gently put her brother back down before effortlessly jumping half a foot forwards to land on the stage and walking over to her uncle to hug him.

"And who is this young testosterone filled teen who's grabbed the attention of my favourite nie-"

"Don't you dare finish that sentence Uncle Tony. I don't care if you're Iron Man, I'm not your only niece anymore, there's Alyona as well, and let's not forget that Thor and Jane are expecting twins, one of whom is also going to be your niece, so you can stop being a dick because -"

"Natalia Nadia Barton don't you dare use that kind of language!" A voice boomed from behind one of the curtains as a muscular sandy blonde haired man walked into view.

"Hey Legolas, nice of you to have joined the party," Stark laughed.

Clinton Francis Barton just shook his head in amusement before handing the nine month old little girl in his arms over to her godfather before spreading his arms out wide.

Nadia latched herself onto her father and hugged him with all her strength.

When they parted, he immediately asked her: "What did I say about the cussing?"

"Not anywhere Jojo or Aly-cat can hear," she muttered.

Her mood brightened almost instantly though upon realising that Marvin was standing a few feet away from her, looking awkward. "Daddy, Uncle Tony, Josef, Alyona, this is my friend Marvin Samuels. He's a huge fan Uncle Tony," she smiled as she beckoned him over.

The Hawkeye opened his mouth, presumably to ask about the teen about how intentions towards his daughter, only to be cut off with a glare from his eldest. "He's my _friend_ dad," she emphasised as she rolled her eyes.

Josef just grabbed his hand and asked him if he was good at playing Mario Kart Wii and did he read any comics, to which Marvin answered: "Sorry kid, but Batman would kick Mario's ass from Gotham all the way into Bowser's dungeons."

"I like him," Josef stated evenly. "You've got my permission to ask out my big sister."

Everyone's eyes widened in response. Josef was well known in the family for not liking outsiders, so to say that they were gobsmacked would be an understatement. Marvin tried to keep the smile off his face for gaining his approval.

Clint opened his mouth again and grumbled something about no-one having his permission to date her until she was thirty.

"Dad don't make me shove an arrow up your -"

"Katniss as hilarious as this is, your dad is just being an overprotective father who is trying, and failing to assert his dominance."

"Hey!" Clint exclaimed.

"Cut the crap dad, we know mom's in charge and that you're still whipped after nineteen years of marriage."

Clint just pouted.

"Look Marvin, I guess this means that I'll be moving back to New York now," she whispered as behind her, Tony dragged a struggling Agent Barton away to give his daughter some privacy. Josef sat a few feet away tickling Alyona, but frequently glancing back up at his sister at consistent intervals with his little hawk-eyes. "And after only three days," she muttered under her breath.

"Hey," Marvin murmured gently as he gripped her chin and turned her face to look at him. "I forgive you, you've got some intense family secrets you have to protect. But I'm gonna miss you."

"You could come and visit me in New York," she stated. "I ran a background check on you, no offence but my family is full of paranoid, crazy idiots who want to know everything about everyone, so I know your family live there."

"Maybe," he smiled back. "I came to this boarding school to avoid them as they don't like that I'm smart and not sporty, but I could probably put up with them if I still got to see my best friend."

They both smiled at each other before Marvin drew her into a hug.

"Your dad is giving me a death glare," he stage whispered to her.

Without even turning around to look at him she replied: "Daddy I'll tell mom about all the junk food you've been letting us eat."

His face blanched. "You wouldn't dare."

"We'll just take a detour in my jet to Paraguay on the way back home to go tell the misses then won't we Hawkass."

"It's Papa New Guinea actually Tin Man," Nadia quipped.

"Burn."

Tony pulled up an app on his phone. The sound of Indiana Jones' whip being lashed echoed around the auditorium.

Both men stood toe-to-toe in their stare-off.

"If you don't stop right this second, I'm phoning Pepper and mom and Tony's going to be sleeping on the couch and dad's gonna wake up in the middle of nowhere with nothing but the clothes on his back and an arrow up his -"

"You know what Robin Hood, Merida, I'm just going to take Rapunzel and the little bird and use them as a shield on the way back."

"Hell no Tin Can you aren't using me like that mother fuc-"

Clint and Nadia turned and glared at the billionaire who currently had no suit to protect him.

"What did you teach my son when I left you alone for all of two minutes yesterday?" The infamous Hawkeye threatened as he began to stalk towards the rapidly retreating figure.

"Mommy!" He yelled as he ran off with Clint racing off behind him.

"Great. Now I have to look after two man-children," Nadia groaned.

"Call me soon," Marvin answered as he pulled the red head back into his embrace.

She wiped away a stray tear that had fallen down his cheek. "Hey, you'll see me soon," She laughed. "Heck, I might even introduce you to Uncle Tony's A.I. and the rest of the Avengers."

"The rest of -"

"Did my fake last name and the archery nicknames not give you a clue?"

"So your mom is?"

"There's a reason Tony called Jojo the itsy bitsy spider."

All the colour seemed to drain from his face upon the realisation of just who her parents were.

"Don't worry, dad's just overprotective, and mom is to a certain extent, it's just that mom loves to intimidate everyone she meets, so don't take it personally."

The science geek visibly gulped.

Nadia laughed at his expression and kissed his cheek. "Cap will love you because you're a genuinely nice person, and Tony and Bruce will talk science with you. Thor is just a huge affectionate puppy, and his wife Jane is a science geek too, so there's no problem there. But just watch out for my adoptive cool Aunt Darcy, Jane's assistant, she just lives to cause misery and prank everyone."

She tapped his cheeks twice and squeezed his shoulder lightly before walking over to retrieve her siblings. She picked up Alyona and swung the toddler around gracefully before balancing her against her hip and taking Josef's hand.

She winked at Marvin as she left, whilst he stood stock still staring gob-smacked at her disappearing figure.

* * *

Okay, so these fics never turn out the way I planned but oh well. I wasn't planning on creating a possible love interest for Naddy, but hopefully that scene worked out okay. Will he appear again? I have no freaking clue, but I like him so maybe in a future fic I don't know.

Anyway, I'm now accepting prompts for other "Tony blows Nadia's cover" scenes. If you want me to write other tropes for Nadia and Marvin, I might upload a different series of one-shots. I'm not planning on it though.

Also, expect infrequent updates. I'm a lazy shit and I'm too busy procrastinating reading other fics to do anything, let alone doing my college work or writing more fics.

Finally, thanks for reading.


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